Thursday, February 7

You've been an MBA for TOO long when...

  • You ask the waiter what the restaurant's core competencies are.
  • You decide to re-org your family into a "team-based organization."
  • You refer to dating as test marketing.
  • You can spell "paradigm."
  • You actually know what a paradigm is.
  • You understand your airline's fare structure.
  • You write executive summaries on your love letters.
  • Your Valentine's Day cards have bullet points.
  • You think that it's actually efficient to write a ten page presentation with six other people you don't know.
  • You celebrate your wedding anniversary by conducting a performanceb review.
  • You believe you never have any problems in your life just "issues" and "improvement opportunities".
  • You end every argument by saying "let's talk about this off-line".
  • You can explain to somebody the difference between "re-engineering","down-sizing", "right-sizing", and "firing people's xxx".
  • You actually believe your explanation in the above point.
  • You talk to the waiter about process flow when dinner arrives late.
  • You start to feel sorry for Dilbert's boss.
  • You account for your tuition as a capital expenditure instead of an expense.
  • You insist that you do some more market research before you and your spouse produce another child.
  • At your last family reunion, you wanted to have an emergency meeting about their brand equity
  • Your "deliverable" for Sunday evening is clean laundry and paid bills.
  • You use the term "value-added" without falling down laughing.
  • You ask the car salesman if the car comes with a whiteboard and Internet connection.
  • You give constructive feedback to your dog.
  • You give your boyfriend / girfriend a golden handshake on the way out!
  • You can add value to this list by contributing to it

2 comments:

The Big K said...

....You start feeling sorry for PHB
.....
lol, that was cool!

Prasad said...

heh, yeah biggie! i almost can identify with him on certain days!!